I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
