We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
