guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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