So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
