Rock
Scissors
Fuck
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
