It's Friday. Sex?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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