her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
