Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Randomize
