I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
vagina is talking i cant
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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