friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
