I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
