I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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