But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
it glows. i had to have it.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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