I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
