hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
