i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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