But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
