In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
