Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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