my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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