I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
she told me i tasted like america
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize
