For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
