so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
