Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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