It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize
