i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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