So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
