wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Randomize