What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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