I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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