conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
