Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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