I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
