I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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