Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
