please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize