just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
