WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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