whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
God, I missed his penis.
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