This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Randomize
