She said her name was "party"
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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