Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Randomize
