I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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