I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
