East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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