My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
