forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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