We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
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We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I yelled at your uterus for you.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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