69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
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