Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Two words: nipple clamps
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