I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize