my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
