I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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